Dolphins

From The Encyclopedia of Pointless

Dolphins are nice. Don't believe me? Well, how about after you hear the following facts:

1 Dolphins are Friendly
2 Dolphins have an Advanced Sonar System
3 Dolphins are Mammals
4 Dolphins all Look Cool
5 Dolphins are Smart
6 Dolphins play Those Cute Horn Things in the Circus

Dolphins are Friendly

When was the last time you heard of a dolphin-related death, or someone being mugged by a dolphin? It's so rare it's practically unheard of, especially if you don't count the dolphin riots of 2156. That really doesn't count though, since it hasn't happened yet.

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Dolphins have an Advanced Sonar System

When was the last time you used sound to see things? If you're most people, you probably haven't. Dolphins have, however. They do it all the time. It's like second nature to them. Isn't that funny?

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Dolphins are Mammals

Here's a fact that has been pounded into your skull since birth, or in some cases, before birth. Every time someone says "Dolphins, whales, porpoises, and other animals of the order Cetacea are fish!" instantly that person is known as stupid from that time on. It's the most common way people are dubbed stupid in movies. Luckily, nobody in reality thinks that dolphins, whales, porpoises, and other animals of the order Cetacea are fish. They really have no choice.

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Dolphins all Look Cool

When was the last time you saw an ugly dolphin? You haven't. Because there aren't any. Simple as that. Humans are often ugly, but dolphins aren't. Pretty telling, isn't it?

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Dolphins are Smart

Scientists are always telling us that dolphins are smart. Thus, they must be smart. I'll bet dolphins could appreciate logic like that since they're so smart. Also, I'd like to add that many scientists will tell you that humans are dumb. I've never heard a scientist say that dolphins are dumb. Why would they? They're not dumb at all!

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